The end of the year is an exciting time. That’s when we start to see all the Christmas lights along the streets. Many will also be starting to organise Christmas parties and gift exchanges, while others go overseas for vacations.

As the year comes to a close, there is often much joy in gathering with our friends, celebrating the past year and looking forward to the new year.

But for those of us who don’t have many plans in this period, or have been through a rough year… things might be different.

For some, festive seasons can trigger feelings of loneliness. Witnessing parties and vacations on social media can also evoke jealousy and FOMO.

The year-end period can also cause fear and anxiety for some who may feel like they haven’t achieved their resolutions or resolved the problems this year has surfaced.

There is a name for this general feeling. The Institute of Mental Health (IMH) calls it “holiday blues”, a phenomenon where one feels stressed or overwhelmed nearing the year end festive season.

This can be caused by the pressure of societal expectations like needing to having plans, peers or parties in place, or disappointment from not meeting one’s expectations for the year.

I might be a little blue myself, when I think about the year I have had. So much had happened. I finally graduated. I found a full-time job that’s close to my heart. I found a new church community to settle down in.

But I have also experienced much pain and setbacks this year, especially in the areas of friendships and mental wellness.

This year has been a roller-coaster ride and a whole bag of mixed emotions, and I have come to realise that it’s important to unpack everything to bring the year to a proper close.

So, if you are feeling the blues more than the reds and greens this season, would you consider trying out these four simple strategies with me?

1. Reflect on the year

“I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:19-23)

Looking back at the year, I realised that though I experienced loss in the area of friendships, God has also ushered in new people and new seasons in my life.

As I journeyed through rejection and brokenness, God began to grow a heart of compassion within me for the lost. And with the encouragement and prompting from a few new friends, I actually committed to going for my first mission trip this month.

As we look back at the year, we will begin to see how God has never forsaken us and how He has taken care of us even in the darkest valleys.

Recognising God’s faithfulness in these situations helps us see Him rightly. He did not send punishments or curses into our lives. Instead, God took what the enemy meant for evil and used it for good.

Scripture tells us that this is what hope is. It’s not about a blind optimism that overlooks all of life’s afflictions. Hope arises when we see that we have not been consumed by the storms in life, because God’s love and compassion have never failed us.

2. Reach out to trusted friends

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” (Proverbs 17:17)

God puts people in our lives with whom we can walk through life with; there are loyal friends who will stick closer than brothers (Proverbs 18:24).

Whether you are feeling sad, lonely, FOMO or sian towards this season, look for a trusted person with whom you can be real. We don’t have to have a lot of friends, and you don’t have to fill up your calendar with plans that will keep you company all the time.

It’s about letting someone in on what you’re facing and allowing them to look out for you (it’ll also be helpful if you can let them know how!).

Reaching out to friends demolishes the lie that we are completely alone and reminds us that we are seen, remembered and loved. There is always someone who cares and we do matter to them.

3. Reconsider your plans

“A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” (Proverbs 11:25)

Planning a Christmas mission trip made me realise that we can actually help ourselves to cope with the holiday blues — we need to learn to engage our minds and spend our time meaningfully.

Having no plans and allowing ourselves to rot at home and doomscroll will only intensify our loneliness and sadness. Seeing or hearing how much fun other people are having at their parties, or how many friends they are meeting… it’s easy to spiral further in jealousy and self-pity.

Rather than getting drowned in misery, we should focus our eyes on the Lord and look for something meaningful to do with our hands.

Sign up to volunteer at church events. Ask to serve in your church for Christmas services, or join others to serve local communities. As we imitate Christ in the manner of valuing others above ourselves (Philippians 2:4) and serving others (Matthew 23:11), we will find that true life is indeed found when we lay it down for God.

4. Recognise the small wins

“Who dares despise the day of small things…” (Zechariah 4:10)

Weeks ago, I was sharing with a church friend about how this year has been for me when his reply caught me off-guard: “It’s so clear that God is doing something in your life as you simply choose obedience at every step.”

His words moved me to tears because it shifted my perspective. When I looked at the bigger picture, it was clear that all the small steps I had taken this year were not in vain.

But God sees every small step of obedience. He hears every prayer that we make in the wilderness and He collects every tear.

Though breakthroughs or progress didn’t come in the form that I expected, God was undeniably at work. Before this year, I never imagined that I would settle down in full-time ministry so quickly. And I never once thought that I would go for a mission trip this year.

What I saw as simple and insignificant responses actually amounted to something bigger that God was and is doing in my life.

When we are in the thick of our battles, it can sometimes seem like we are just doing the next right thing. We often feel lost and disoriented, maybe even discouraged at times, and we wonder if we are actually making any progress.

But God sees every small step of obedience. He hears every prayer that we make in the wilderness and He collects every tear we sow.

Take heart that we will surely reap with songs of joy! One step at a time, slowly but surely, we will get there.