Waiting has always been a dreadful process to me, a word I’ve hated since I was young.
Whether it was going to the swimming pool or getting something I wanted, I always had to wait for it. I greatly disliked having to wait for every single thing in life.
The word began to carry negative connotations to me; waiting frequently meant uncertainty, hopelessness and disappointments.
So I grew up as an impatient person. To speed up the process of waiting, I often took things into my own hands – desperate to fast forward to the good parts.
For example, when it came to relationships, I refused to wait for a godly man to pursue me. I chose to take matters into my own hands – eager to arouse love. I hung out too much with the opposite gender, I wore my heart on my sleeve, and literally jumped on any chance to make a man admire me.
I lived to chase after the approval and love of men. Eventually, however, all my efforts proved futile. At the end of the day, I still felt so unloved and unwanted.
At some point I finally turned my sense of hopelessness over to God, crying out to Him with the bitterness within my heart. And as I was busy throwing tantrums to my Abba Father, He convicted my heart.
Wait upon me.
What did that mean? I came to learn that waiting for men frequently led me to chase after the wind. I never found true contentment or satisfaction. Instead, I found myself getting disappointed over and over again.
But in choosing to wait upon God and completely depending on Him, I learnt that that is when God acts (Isaiah 64:4) and renews our strength (Isaiah 40:31).
I often took things into my own hands – desperate to fast forward to the good parts.
Some of the greatest figures in the Bible like Abraham and Moses had to wait for many years to see God’s promises come to pass.
Everything that happened before the promise was fulfilled was meant to prepare them. Moses waited 40 years for God before he became the deliverer of the Israelites; Abraham waited till old age to have Isaac.
I’m learning how to wait on God. I am training myself to do it – to feast on His word and find satisfaction in the presence of Christ. I want to maximise my singlehood by concerning myself with the matters of the Lord and pleasing Him (1 Corinthians 7:32).
So, sisters and brothers in Christ, I encourage you with Solomon 3:5b, “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.”
Don’t awaken love or stir it up until the time is ripe and you’re ready. Don’t rush into a love that will not mature or be fruitful. You deserve God’s best.
We can trust God, in whom our “hope does not disappoint” (Romans 5:5). When a relationship blossoms in His timing, a love resembling the Father’s love will be awakened.
That is the best kind of love – the kind worth waiting for.