Having led cell for nearly a decade, these are some of my key realisations and questions that I wished someone had asked me earlier – short and quick one since we know leaders are busy. Now, in no particular order of importance…

1. Cell isn’t just yummy snacks and meals together. Are people being spiritually fed?

Saying this as kindly as possible: there are some cell groups where the food is the main thing, whether that’s the cell-accompanying potluck or the refreshments.

In such groups, it can feel like other core components in the session – worship, Word, discussion, sharing, etc. – are just things to get through before finally arriving at the main event.

Food and fellowship are blessings. But if we are the same people at the end of cell group, unchanged by the Spirit and having gone no deeper into the things of God or the spiritual community we share – then we may need to refocus on filling our spiritual bellies first.

2. A healthy cell isn’t necessarily reflected by a lively group chat. The real question is, are they having conversations that truly matter?

When I first started cell leading, I held, for some reason, the problematic belief that if the group chat was bustling — that meant the cell group was thriving. 

That view was too simplistic, and it also led me to drive the chat purposelessly.

In reality, there are cell groups where people don’t really talk online, yet deep life-on-life stuff happens when they meet in person because they feel safe and brave enough to have meaningful conversations that are needed.

Likewise, there are cell groups where dozens of memes are being pumped through the chat in a single day, fun conversations flow freely… yet no words of spiritual significance are ever exchanged.

So, don’t freak out prematurely if your group chat is always “dead” because that’s not the most accurate spiritual thermostat. Our job as cell leaders is simply to foster environments and provide opportunities where both fun and deeper things are discussed – then pray that God will give the growth!

3. Cell members may be listening well enough to each other. But are they also speaking truth in love and correcting one another?

That sounds very tough. Will be praying for you. Thanks for sharing. That’s good… but what’s next?

Sharing is not the be-all and end-all of discipleship. Application, so that we leave the room looking a little more like Christ — that’s what the cell group is about.

It’s a good thing to create a space where members feel comfortable enough to pour out their worries and frustrations, but we can’t stop there. We must apply the Word of God to our lives.

We need to create a culture where members are unafraid to speak the truth in love, willing to take correction and will actually do something so we all grow into Christlikeness.

4. The cell spends time together, and enjoys doing things together. But beyond discipleship, are these meetings and activities actually gathering people into the Kingdom?

Sometimes, you come across groups where the member count has stayed the same for years.

Discipleship is not a numbers game. But if no one is ever being evangelised to, won over and added to the group, then you have to ask as a leader: What are we actually doing?

A common outcome for such insular groups is that they will face attrition by distraction, stagnation and time — and eventually sputter out.

So, a cell group that seeks to be siloed and just do their own thing among themselves is actually a failure in discipleship. There is a difference between consolidation (beneficial after a period of active growth) and isolation.

As leaders, we cannot allow for such a culture to take root, because the Gospel must ground our time together in cell group. We cannot separate evangelism from discipleship.

Additionally, it helps to remember that the Gospel is neither boring nor powerless. So if cell has become stale, we need to ask ourselves where the Gospel is in it. 

5. Things might look good on the surface of a member’s life… but we cannot assume that they actually are.

I once had a member who was: 

• Regular in church service
• Regular in cell group
• The joker of the cell group
• Led worship in cell group
• Served on the worship team during church service
• The eldest child of longtime members in the church 

Early on as her leader, I wrongly assumed she would be fine and never really went deep with her… I mistook activity for an authentic relationship with Jesus.

Much later, I came to find out she doesn’t even believe in certain core doctrines like the Trinity and was living a starkly different kind of life “outside of church”, even getting into a relationship with a non-Christian.

It took years of intentional journeying to win back her trust and my right to speak into her life. I can only thank God that He preserved her so that she’s still in my cell group, and that I have a second chance to continue discipling her.

We cannot afford to make assumptions about people, especially when we don’t go deep with them as their leaders. Assumptions serve no one but the lethargic leader who is unwilling to do what it takes for the sake of Gospel-centred discipleship (and I can say that because I was once that person!).

We have to make the time to meet. Find out what they believe, what worries them – what they dream for in this life. Point them to Jesus. If we don’t want to do these things, we should reconsider leading.

6. We do our best to help our members encounter God in community, worship and the Word. But they have to choose God for themselves. Some will, some won’t.

Mourn bad choices and celebrate good ones, but don’t wear a weight that doesn’t belong to you. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. So just be faithful and do the best you can with God’s help, and entrust your cell members to Him.

7. Leading with succession in mind is good stewardship

I was once part of a cell group with leaders who, through no fault of their own, entered a new life stage rapidly.

One weekend, the group was called into a meeting where we were haphazardly promoted and carved into a few separate groups that would become our new cell groups. No discussion, little runway… and that was that.

Many years later, and the effects from that troubled transition are still felt keenly – most sadly in the departure of some members from that original group. Sometimes I can’t help but wonder if they would still be here if we hadn’t shaken things up in quite such a way.

We need to lead with the end in mind. That means – well before multiplication – looking out for (though not necessarily locking in) men and women of character within the group who you might potentially take under your wing and mentor as part of your core group of future leaders.

Some people will surprise you – the ones you least expect may well just rise up in remarkable ways that really give God the glory. You won’t know until you give your people opportunities to serve and spearhead things so you see how they respond.

After all these years, I’m seeing more and more that I don’t have all the answers and I never will.

These are just the lessons I’ve picked up along the way as a cell leader and I’m sure there will be many more to come in the years ahead.

But one thing I do know is this: I have grace from God for this journey. I have made so many mistakes as a leader and yet He has always held it together for us by His grace.

I thank God for that. Truly, the cell group belongs to Him, and I am just a willing hand that serves in the way He desires. When I serve from that posture, I know He will have my back.