Joshua served as Moses’ assistant for 40 years (Numbers 11:28).

40 years. One of Israel’s greatest military leaders, conqueror of the Amalekites – an assistant! Most people wouldn’t even hold the same position for more than 10 years, much less 40. Perhaps it was for Joshua’s sake – and ours now as well – that we read stories like this.

In Exodus 17, Joshua led Israel to battle the Amalekites. When the staff of God was raised, he prevailed. But when it was lowered, Amalek prevailed.

How humbling that must have been! For all his training, expertise and fighting spirit, the outcome of the battle was determined by the height of a wooden staff.

And we see in Numbers, Joshua being rebuked for defending Moses. The spirit of Lord is not reserved for any one man, but that the Lord gives to whom He pleases. He alone holds all things in His hand.

What does it mean to serve a God like that? What would that do to you? I think it would give you cause to serve as a second fiddle for 40 years, even though you are younger, stronger – braver one might argue – than your superior.

The leadership of God’s people is no place for ego, might or human expertise. No, it is surrender to the God who holds all things in His hand – submission to His sovereignty that triumphs over all other kingdoms. And if He should hold you in the same position for 40 years, you should be glad and rejoice in His will for you.

Ever since my reformation, I have desired to teach and preach. I want to share my knowledge with those around me. But often have I written fanciful words and elegant prose with no regard for those who might hear – only that they might look upon me and approve.

How am I to serve a God to whom I have not submitted?

Oh the pieces I’ve written to glorify myself! The testimonies I’ve planned and executed, not to share the gospel, but to esteem myself! God, I’ve asked you for a long time what you want out of my life. But increasingly, the question that’s truly on my heart is this: “Why have You not esteemed me?”

I’ve been asking why I haven’t been worshipped! The audacity! How truly stupid and foolish and blind I still am, that I would demand of God a position of honour and authority among His people – among any people! How am I to serve a God to whom I have not submitted? How am I to worship a God that I have demanded worship me?

Who is in charge here? Who is king?

Lord, if for 40 years I am to plan children’s lessons or play second fiddle to every electric guitarist in the worship team, then let it be so.

But don’t let me do it with the way my heart is. Lord, help me to rejoice, delight and truly revel in serving a God so big. If I am to be forgotten by the world, then let me take pleasure only in that I am remembered by You. And Lord, I have been!

Help me take joy in the gospel of Christ, in living it out and proclaiming it no matter where You place me. Lord this is Your Kingdom, I am your servant – rule and reign as You please.

Jesus, You are King. The throne belongs to You.

This article was first published on Nicholas’ blog, and is republished with permission.