“One man built his house on the sand … It crashed! It crashed!”

What followed this bizarre outcry were more words I could not understand, not even as a special needs teacher. My student drew more lines on the board and made drastic hand gestures. His head turned toward different triggers, every few seconds – his mind was in chaos.

Later, this episode gave me cause for reflection:

• Did I know what was in the mind of this child with autism? No, I think even he was not able to make sense of his thoughts.
• Was I prepared to work with children with special needs? No, children were the last group I thought I would work with after graduation, much less so children with special needs.
• Did I learn anything about special education at university? No, I studied linguistics.
• Did I choose to work as an early intervention teacher for children with special needs? Yes, I did – with no regrets.

Teaching children with special needs was an unexpected but rewarding choice. Some of my greatest joys at work occur when my students show progress or express enjoyment in a particular activity – their happiness can be so contagious!

However, the work can also be draining: With children, many things can happen in the split second we take our eyes off them. Hence, I always have to keep one eye on my students – even when I am taking something from the cupboard.

I need to rely even more on God to help me love the child when he or she proves so difficult to love.

Yet, there are also times when I lose patience with my students, especially when they refuse to do  work even though the assigned task falls within their capabilities. It frustrates me because they avoid the task not because it is too difficult for them, but because they simply do not want to do it.

In such situations, it’s all too easy to start developing negative feelings toward the child, even though my frustration is with the behaviour – not the child. In such situations, I need to rely even more on God to help me love the child when he or she proves so difficult to love.

Although most of us would acknowledge that no human being is perfect, we tend to ascribe greater value to those who have no disability over those with a disability. In addition, some people may think people with special needs are vastly different from those without disability.

Yet, if we were to define “disability” as “weakness” – we’d realise that we all in fact have some degree of “disability”.

No one is without weakness.

Similarly, just as every person has strengths and weaknesses, so do people with special needs. Despite their disability, people with special needs have abilities and strengths in other aspects of life too. However, this doesn’t mean that just because a person has special needs, he or she shows special talent in music or art. Just like everyone else: some do and some don’t.

I believe that as we interact with members of the special needs community, we should treat them as we would any other person. This can mean two things: We should treat them with dignity and be careful not to put them down, just because they seem “different”.

We also shouldn’t think that they are more “fragile” than anyone else, solely by virtue of their disability. Hence, if they need to be corrected in anything, it should be done as firmly as with someone else without disability.

As we serve members in the special needs community, we seek to know them as individuals: Their strengths, difficulties, likes, dislikes and what helps them cope better. But sometimes, in our best interests, we may end up doing more harm than good.

For example, when we do everything for the person instead of giving him or her opportunities to do things independently, this may promote an over-reliance on others in the individual. Thus, knowing the individual well will help us make more informed decisions that would best benefit the person.

When we seek to include people with special needs in our community, we need to be willing to be flexible. This might even mean putting ourselves in uncomfortable positions to bridge the gap between us and persons with disabilities. However, while this may require stepping out of our comfort zones, discernment is also needed to ensure that we do not put ourselves in positions of compromise.

We might also need to change our worldview by seeking to better understand members of the special needs community, accommodating them and giving them opportunities to learn to adapt to mainstream society. Inclusion is a two-way street; both people with and without disabilities need to make a concerted effort to accommodate and adapt to each other.

For these reasons, I believe we’re not too different from people with special needs. We all have disabilities to differing degrees – yet this doesn’t make any of us any less human. I believe everyone – including people with special needs – have equal inherent value.
Every life is a gift; every life is precious.

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” (Psalm 139:14)

There is no one life that is more important than another; every person has an equal but different part to play.